Sunday, December 28, 2008
I have always said that black women are simply female versions of black men. I receive a lot of negative reactions from black women who are anti-black male when I state this, but I will contend that the differences between black women and black men are differences related mostly to gender as opposed to different socialization (which does play some role, but not as much as they would like it to play). Give a black woman higher levels of testosterone and switch her sexual orientation toward other women, and she will show many of the same characteristics of black men, good or bad. Look at Felicia "Snoop" Pearson; a former drug dealer who served 8 years for second degree murder of a black woman. Look and Shawntee "Da Brat" Harris who was sentenced to three years in prison for aggravated assault of a black woman. The former is openly homosexual while the latter is rumored to be the same. Missy Elliot has had such rumors and much of the way that she presents herself is similar to the stereotypical thuggish ways associated with black men.
This brings me to the point of this post.
As revealed in Divided Sisters: Bridging The Gap Between Black Women and White Women, there is a greater tendency for black lesbians to be in interracial relationships than is the case with heterosexuals. As with black men, they often are criticized for their high tendencies to have relationships with white women. From chapter four of Divided Sisters:
Many African American lesbians are quick to assign ulterior motives to others in their community who love White women. "Black lesbians who date White women are suffering from self-hate," says one Black lesbian named Rhonda. "They think some White woman is going to lift them up." African American scholar Brenda Verner similarly claims, "Like Black men who have become obsessed with white women, many black lesbian feminists are caught in the net of "jungle fever."
I love the irony. "Suffering from self-hate" and "they think some White woman is going to lift them up". These words sound awfully familiar. Here is more:
I was at a party with my White girlfriend, and this Black woman started hitting on me. When my White lover saw what was going on, she came over and sat next to me, kind of making it clear that the two of us were together. Well, this other woman, who was being so nice and friendly, all of sudden turned vindictive. Then, after finding out that I was president of NOW, she very snootily commented, "Oh, that's why you've got a White girlfriend."
My Black girlfriend once dropped my hand when a group of radical Black lesbians walked in the room. It really made me mad, and I think her attitude about me being White was something that ultimately led to us breaking up. It is very hard on Black lesbians to have other Black lesbians accuse them of being politically incorrect, or betraying Black sisterhood.
The parallels are amazing and the point I am trying to make is that these black lesbians are black females, they are socialized from childhood the same as any other black female, yet when they develop a sexual orientation toward women and/or tend to be more masculine than normal, they seem to mimic many of the characteristics commonly associated with black men.
I guess one can now argue that when black women are homosexual, they "adhere to a European standard of beauty". I guess it is now correct to say that "white lesbians appreciate the beauty of black women more than black lesbians". We can go on. This just goes to show the repeated hypocrisy of the anti-black male crowd.
Friday, December 26, 2008
Ashford and Simpson.
35 years of Marriage.
For some time, I have been baffled by how comfortably certain individuals casually toss out falsehoods and misrepresentations. This has been a constant with the Something New Crew and has extended to their allies. Over on the blog What About Our Daughters, Gina McCauley presents herself as an advocate for black women and dedicates herself to promoting black female victimism while commonly practicing black male bashing. Her blog is not and interracial blog, yet she seems to be quite in tune with Evia and her followers. When she had a blog roll, she included Evia's site on it and she was quite upset by the Quiana Jenkins-Pietrzak case. In her endeavors, she has targeted several black men for ridicule and attack. I will focus on two of these individuals.
The first is Genarlow Wilson. Genarlow Wilson was acquitted of the rape of a 17 year old classmate at a private party that turned in what would basically be a teenage drunken orgy. The actual sex act between the two was video taped and has been described as like this:
"In a portion of a tape obtained by "Primetime," Wilson, then 17 and an honor student and star athlete who was homecoming king, is seen having intercourse with a 17-year-old girl, who was seen earlier on the bathroom floor. During the sex act, she appears to be sleepy or intoxicated but never asks
And like this:
"Later in the evening, a 17-year-old girl began to have sex with the young men, first in the bathroom, then on the bed. Genarlow is captured on tape appearing to have sex with the girl from behind. Her hand is clearly visible on the floor supporting herself. Witnesses said she was a willing participant."
And then we have the predominantly white jury's reaction to viewing the tape:
"I mean it wasn't even an hour," said jury forewoman Marie Manigault. "We immediately saw the tape for what it was. We went back and saw it again and saw what actually happened and everybody immediately said NOT GUILTY."
So can someone please explain, based on this information, how she could print this statement on her blog:
"She should not have consumed any booze so therefore she can’t claim victim status when GENARLOW WILSON and his five buddies brutalize her body while she is unconscious."
Where on Earth did anyone say that anyone, including Genarlow, brutalized her body while she is unconscious? This borders on a flat out lie. Also from the same link, she quotes and agrees with someone else's statement:
"No matter how much (two glasses of
Does this individual have any clue what the definition of "comatose" is?
Genarlow Wilson did not rape his 17 year old classmate. Was he stupid? Sure. He indulged in drinking and marijuana during the party (which would have made him just as drunk/high as the girl). He allowed himself to be filmed in sex acts and didn't use any judgment in his encounter with the 15 year old girl. But we don't send promising young men to prison based solely on stupidity, yet Gina, in her apparent disdain for black men, is quite willing to ruin this young man's life based on the accusations of a girl who was clearly upset with herself and her own poor judgment. It's shameful.
The next man is DL Hughley. Hughley referred to the members of the Rutger's lady basketball team as "the ugliest women I have ever seen in my life". Did the the ladies of Rutgers deserve this? Of course not. Beauty is subjective and to some men, these woman could be viewed as quite beautiful. But the truth is that often when women grow to over 6 feet tall and are physically capable of taking it to the hoop with the best of them, they tend to not posses the standard looks men typically view as attractive. This is not limited to black women. But Gina makes this claim:
"In other words, Hughley was basically saying “It’s okay. I’m Black and I think Black women are ugly too— in fact, they are some of the “ugliest women I have ever seen in my life!”" More After the jump."
Hughley never made this claim about black women in general. As ugly as his words were, he made this claim about a particular group of women who happened to be black. Plus, two of the members of that group were white and I doubt that Hughley was excluding them from his statement. And there is this:
"Much like their reaction to Hughley taking his minstrelsy on to the Tonight Show with Jay Leno to say Black women are the ugliest women he has ever seen in his life..."
Again she makes the false claim that Hughley is referencing black women in general. Hell, the man just recently told Maryline Blackburn that she is a beautiful woman. THE MAN IS MARRIED TO A BLACK WOMAN.
Often times, common sense and honesty goes out the window when one practices demagoguery. This violation of the truth is almost a sickness and it is quite unhealthy for our community.
Sunday, December 21, 2008
Thomas and Joan Gosier, married May 28, 2000, have been married nearly 8 years. CONGRATULATIONS!
The Gosier's are the founders of HBCU kidz, Inc. and have recently launched a black parenting site called BlackParentConnect.com. Their site seeks to uplift, celebrate and value children of color.
I found an interesting blog on Rachel's Tavern (Rachel is herself a sociology professor). In this blog, she cites studies from Qian 1997 and Kalmijn 1993 that indicate that white men in marriages with black women, on average, have less education than black men married to black women. Here is what she says (note the part in bold):
"Demographic studies have found that Black women/White men marriages tend to be exceptional when it comes to educational status. Black women are more likely than other groups of women to marry someone with less education when they marry intraracially or interracially (Kalmijn 1993, Qian 1997). What is even more interesting is that Black women in interracial relationships are even more likely to marry a less educated man than Black women in same race relationships. This trend is even more striking given White men’s higher average levels of education and income (Qian 1997, Kalmijn 1993). Rational choice theorists could argue that Black women more than any other group must trade higher levels of education since both their gender and race are perceived as lower than that of White men. This could also mean that only the highest status Black women could have interracial marital opportunities."
I find these studies quite ironic since the Something New Crew constantly claim the need to date and marry white men and other non-black men due to the notion that there are not enough black men at their education level. But how is this solved when you are marrying white men who are at an even lower education level than the black men available to you?
Wednesday, December 17, 2008
Patrick and Gina Neely.
Co-owners of Neelys Bar-B-Q in Memphis, one of the most successful restaurants in the South. They have been sweethearts since high shool.
If one notices on the the blogs of the "Something New Sell-Out Crew", black men are held in very low regard. Practically nothing positive done by any black man will be focused on by any of the followers of this warped ideology. Yet one man is an exception to this rule. His name is Barack Obama. Why is this the case? Quite simply, Obama is the flavor of the month. Actually, his 'flavor' extends well beyond a month, but the concept still applies.
President Elect Obama is history in the making. He is a black man who has gained the position of most powerful man on Earth. He has accomplished something that many, if not most felt that they would never live to see. It is only because of him that a black woman will hold the title of "First Lady"; one of the most prestigious titles in world. It is because of him that two little black girls will call The White House "home".
When one thinks about it, Barack has achieved something beyond great, yet this really shows how high a black man has to reach in order to be recognized by this crew. In order for a black man to be pictured with his wife among the pictures of white male/black female couples that these women have searched long and hard for, he has to actually become the President of The United States. Being that he is the one and only black man to achieve this, basically every black man in the world, save for one, is not worth their recognition. This places a totally new spin on the old saying that as black folks, "we have to be twice as good as whites to achieve the same accomplishments".
Yes, it really does show the racist aspects of these haters of black men. White racism created an environment whereas black people had to rise to a level well above their white counterparts in order to get the same advantages. This is taken to an extreme with The Something New Crew in that only the presidency will bring them to notice a black man positively. One ignorant ghetto brotha who calls a black woman a "bi*ch" will result in eleven or twelve essay length blogs, but any positive achievements below the presidency won't cut the mustard.
Think about it. Denzel Washington can become one of the most respected and well paid actors in the world, marry a darker skinned black woman, refuse to do scenes he feels would disrespect black women, etc., yet he can't get mentioned by the Sell-Out Crew. Usher got a lot of attention when he postponed his wedding to Tameka, yet when they got married a few days later, they stop talking about him. Take folks like Jesse Jackson Jr. and most other black national politicians who have married black women and realize that they don't care about these men. They didn't care about Obama until he ran for president. He had not reached the criteria for them to give a black man positive credit.
This is quite comparable to white racism. How often have we experienced a racist white person express disdain for blacks, yet point out one or two specific blacks who are "different". In other words, they generally hate blacks, yet will make an exception for one or two black people who are superior to their generally "inferior" brethren. That is the mentality of the Sell-Out Crew as it relates to black men. They have made Barack Obama their token negro man.
Of course they do actually argue that he is different (just like racists generally do). They like to differentiate him from your average African American man by pointing out that he wasn't raised in the black community. Of course, they get quiet and start censoring when you point out that Michael Strahan and Kobe Bryant were raised in Germany (which is far from the black community), yet both married white women. Why didn't they pick up the overwhelming love for black women that the Sell-Out Crew claims that European men have? And if one is realistic, they will realize that if there is a reason why Obama hooked up with a brown skinned, 'clearly black' woman besides falling in love with her, it would be due to him having made effort to embrace the black community. He moved to Chicago and became a community activist, he joined an Afrocentric church and he married a woman they refer to as clearly black. Not embracing the black community is what Tiger Woods did. Those who show hatred for black men under the guise of "interracial relationships" really often appear to be quite backward.
Thursday, December 11, 2008
Now if anyone has spent any amount of time reading the IR blogs in this circle, one would see the simplistic notion that white men and and black women are good, while black men and white women are bad. Now the hypocrisy of the notion of black men being bad while black women are good has repeatedly been exposed as hypocrisy, yet the notion of white women being bad while white men are good is even more baffling. What specifically is the basis for the notion? I know the answer.
White women are bad to them for the simple reasons that, as heterosexuals, they do not desire white women and that white women are the overwhelming champions in the competition for white men. This makes white women bad. Of course, they will not admit this, thus they do what they do so well. The make things up and present such things as fact. Or, in this case, they lend their support to an alleged white man who does the same.
A say "alleged" because I don't see it as beyond one of them to pretend to be a white guy who serves their cause and because this alleged white man's arguments for white guys dating non-white women sound very similar to the Something New Crew's arguments for black women dating non-black men.
But lets say that this is actually a white man. People have referenced evidence that this guy is simply a white guy who is pissed off because he was turned down by some white women in favor of black men. So his revenge fantasy is to try to convince white men to do what he feels that these white women did to him. And sure enough, members of The Something New Crew embraced his foolishness. They are participating with and supporting a blog whose title and premise is blatantly racist and denigrating to white women.
Lets take a look at one of his posts.
"Throughout my life, the white men that I've known who get involved with non-white women generally do so because he just happened to like the woman, not because of her race. If you look at their dating past, you will see that most of the women they have dated are white. So the fact that a particular woman that they were involved with who happened to not be white was merely a coincidence, not a pattern. Even guys who prefer non-white women often primarily date white women. Why? Because it is merely a preference."
Now specifically what makes this a fact? Well, it is apparently fact because he CLAIMS THAT THIS IS WHAT THE GUYS THAT HE KNOWS WHO HAVE DATED NON-WHITE WOMEN DO. In other words, not only are we supposed to automatically believe that these are his actual observations, but that his observations are everyone's observations. Lets go further:
"With the white women I know that date inter-racially, it is different. Just about ALL white women that I know who date inter-racially have a history of dating inter-racially. For example one of my wife's friend's nieces ONLY dates Mexican guys. I know many white women who ONLY date black guys. For white women, race isn't merely a preference, it is a requirement.
Again, we are automatically believe that these are his actual experiences and, if true, his experiences would be everyone's experiences." Here is the rest:
"Oddly enough, despite the fact that race seems to be so much more important to white women than white men, it is white MEN, not women who get pegged as having a fetish when we date inter-racially. Doesn't this seem a bit odd to anyone?"
Notice how he says "despite the FACT" as if it is a "FACT" now that he has claimed to have observed this. Oh, I guess that folks don't lie on the internet.
Now lets take a look at his premise. He seems to believe that exclusively dating someone of another race or at least predominantly dating someone of another race is more of a sign of a fetish. Actually, the opposite is the truth. Folks generally don't form relationships based on fetishes. For example, "chubby chasers" don't particularly start relationships or marry overweight women, but rather seek them to fulfill that particular sexual fetish. So they seek out overweight women for sex, while often limiting their actual GIRLFRIENDS to average sized or slender women. That is the very nature of a fetish.
A white person with a fetish for black people will tend to seek black people for casual sex, but not dedicated relationships. So when one sees white women whose boyfriends or husbands tend to be black, their relationships with black men tend to be preferences as opposed to fetishes. So Mr. Harry Potter's premise is actually quite backward.
Saturday, December 6, 2008
Now lets give her a more balanced view of what black men are dating and marrying.
Warren G., Warren G.'s wife and a friend below:
And I could go on. It's just to easy exposing this nonsense for what it is. NONSENSE. I think that some sistas must come to the realization that they are the reason why they cannot get dates, boyfriends, husbands, etc., not some imaginary injustice directed toward them.
Tuesday, December 2, 2008
Keshia & Kevin
September 3, 2004.
Somewhere along the line, the Something New Crew began spreading the notion that there was some sort of mantra in the black community that black women only date and marry black men. Of course, they NEVER reveal the source of this notion nor any kind of evidence beyond black American women's tendency to not date interracially. In their minds, black women tending to resist interracial dating has to be due to external pressures. The problem is that actual research disputes this.
Sociology Professor Rachel Sullivan of Long Island University in New Your explained on her blog:
"When it comes to Black/White interracial relationships my research indicates, that White women face the most family opposition of all of the race/gender groups. The tactics used to show opposition in White women’s families are often more extreme. They appear to be the group most likely to be disowned or disinvited when they enter interracial relationships."
Research has also shown that white women are more open to dating black men than black women are to dating white men. This begs the question of why the women who face the harshest opposition to interracial dating are more open to it than women who face lesser opposition. The clear answer is INTEREST.
Black women don't date out much because black women are generally less interested in doing so. It is not due to some imaginary mantra. This is just more of the things that the Something New Crew simply makes up.
Black women will date more interracially when they, as a group, become more interested in doing so, not because of some minuscule internet pseudo-social movement based on untruths. There is no "Black Men Only Mantra" and true evidence, as opposed to the personal perceptions of a group of weirdos, shows this.
Sunday, November 30, 2008
This is La (___________). I want to ask you if it is possible for me to obtain some information regarding your blog subscriptions.
Now, I know you may not respond, and I’m aware we don’t see eye to eye on things. However, I’ve shared your blog with a few friends and co-workers and they would like to know your subscription price etc, so would I. Apart from that, there are many things you and some of your commenters have said over the months that I firmly agree with, which has helped me in many ways. I personally admire your drive and courage. I also know this is not easy for you, but you continue to do so unapologetically. I would like you to continue what I call “the awareness growth” on these matters of interracial dating and such for many black women. I’m sorry people had interfere or disrupt with negating comments as I may have in the past. I hope there is no hard feelings.
Thank you so much for your time, and I know you are also busy, but in any event, I would like to hear from you.
Peace and Blessings!
The blog author then posts a version of her email that Evia tampers with and then posts on her blog. The version tampered by Evia goes like this:Hi Evia,This is La (___________). I want to ask you if it is possible for me to obtain a subscription to your blog - with serious consideration that I am also financially challenged in terms of discount. I am being very serious, humble and sincere with these two request and thought about asking for a while now. Now, I know you may reject me because we have not seen eye to eye on things and you may think I have nerves. I realize you may flat out dislike me as I might have given you reason to. However, I would like to say that I have been doing some serious thinking over the months and reforming my ideals in terms of my own self denial and personal issues as a black female. Apart from that, there are many things you and some of your commenters have said over the months that I firmly agree with, which has helped me in many ways. I personally admire your drive and courage. I also know this is not easy for you, but you continue to do so unapologetically. I would like to continue what I call “my awareness growth” on these matters of interracial dating and such. I will NOT interfere or disrupt with negating comments as I may have in the past. I don’t do much commenting lately on many things as well. I rather listen/read and learn. If you want to reject my request, please let me know also. I will understand without hard feelings or bitterness. I know you are also busy, but in any event, I would like to hear from you. Thanks again, L. _________ (I removed La’s last name.)
Big difference right? Evia nearly totally alters this young woman's email and posts it on her blog as if these were this young lady's exact words. So with this occurance, can one ever consider anything Evia posts as credible? This brings me to a recent post by Evia where she posts and alleged email from someone named Cocoa (a not very original name). Based on her history, can we be confident that this is not simply a character from Evia's imagination that she is trying to fool us into believing is an actual person? Isn't it funny that this person who claims to have only been reading Evia's blog for a month spouts the exact same rhetoric that Evia constantly regurgitates? Lets take a look.
"Cocoa" (Evia?) says "I see it every time I walk on to the college campus. Young black women with sour faces at events because they've been passed over for not being light or white enough, yet criticized also for not acting "black" enough."
So I find it interesting that one can see a woman with a sour face on a college campus and conclude that her face is sour because she has been passed over for not being light enough or for not acting black enough. Sort of reminds me of how they used to translate Lassie's barking into complete sentences.
Maybe their faces are sour because they are weary of the pressures of college, such pressures being financial, academic, etc.? Maybe their faces are sour because they have such demeanors and while they may look sour, they may actually be quite happy on the inside? Here's more:
It is scary to think that if I did land an ideal BM that I could have black daughters who could possibly be husbandless or single their entire lives.
So if she lands the "ideal" white man, she would not have daughters who are considered black?
Read through the entire thing and see the bs in it. I doubt that anyone but Evia wrote it hoping that her naive followers will believe that she receives such emails. And as far as the subject matter, if you ask any young black male or female who has no such agenda as Evia and her ilk, they will typically confirm that they have not observed any of such claims. I know that I haven't.
Saturday, November 29, 2008
It seems that the majority of those black female bloggers who are intent on demeaning black men do so under the guise of promoting interracial relationships between black women and non-black men, with the far strongest emphasis placed on relationships with white men. What it truly seems is that the idea of dating and marrying white men is more of a tool for them as opposed to an actual interest. In other words, they seem to want to chase white men not so much because they are drawn to them, but because they feel that it is some type of payback for the perceived mistreatment they have received from black men. It is some type of weird revenge fantasy for them to try and promote a lame movement inspired by the movie "Something New".
Another tool that they attempt to use is the "colorism" that has existed in the African American community for decades. They make effort to try to find any behavior that can be connected to black men and can be perceived as negative and then attempt to exploit that behavior to further their agenda. They don't seek to get a true understanding of "colorism", but rather distort it to the point of making black men appear as damaged as possible. People like Esha "Evia" Moore continuously proclaim that black men practice racism against black women by pursuing black women whose features and complexions are closer to being white.
The problem with this is that this promotes the idea that light skinned black women are not members of the black race/community. How can a man be racist against black women for pursuing a specific type of black woman? That's like saying that since black women are noted for having large, round buttocks, a black man who prefers black women with flat butts is being racist against black women.
They also claim that black men are seeking women who are as close to white as possible, with a pure white woman being their ultimate goal. This is very much contradicted by the fact that one of the popular mixtures of women that black men are commonly attracted to is the black and Asian mixture. In this case, white is totally out of the picture, yet women of such mixture are popular in Hip Hop videos and the like. The truth is that those black men who like mixed black women are not liking the notion of them being closer to being white, but rather like the mixture itself. That is why Kanye West said that men like "mutts". Many men see a certain exoticness when it comes to mixed women and these same men would not see that same exoticness in a typical white woman.
Another thing about this "Something New Crew" is that much of their arguments are based on their alleged personal experiences and expressed personal perceptions. Perceptions are far from facts. One's experiences do not equate to another's experiences. The most objective information comes from actual research and when research supports their claims, they cite such research. The problem is that research rarely supports their many claims and they thus try to proclaim such research as unreliable. For example, Ken and Mamie Clark did a survey of black men for Ebony Magazine some years back and the results showed that 30% of black men preferred lighter skinned women (15% of black women preferred light skinned men). Now while 30% is a significant number, the fact remains that 70% of black men expressed not preferring lighter skinned women. This contradicts the repeated falsehood that MOST black men desire lighter skinned women.
Do lighter skinned black women have an advantage. Probably. Taller men have an advantage over shorter men. This doesn't mean that shorter men are being "discriminated" against and are not being loved and cherished by women. A simple walk through any black neighborhood will reveal black females of all shapes and sizes as well as ALL complexions walking hand in hand with their black male companions and this includes our beautiful darker sistas.
There is irony related to the notion of dating and marrying white men in response to black men's "colorism". What would almost always be the result of a marriage between a black woman and a white man? LIGHT SKINNED CHILDREN. Roughly half of such children will be female, thus their retaliation for black men's alleged "colorism" is to create more redbones and high yellow females for future colorstruck brothas to pursue. It's really laughable.