What about them? Where the hell are they when the “bad” black men are fucking up
the community? Where the hell are they when shit is popping off and black women
and children are dodging bullets in the neighborhood or trying to protect
themselves from rape or some other bullshit? Where the hell are these so-called
good black men when their female counterparts are seeking marriage? I’ll tell
you where MOST of the so-called good black men are: They are off somewhere
taking advantage of their position sexing up every damn woman (and possibly man)
they come in contact with ( here
Most of the so-called good black men are wolves in sheep’s clothing. On paper
they look real nice/appealing, but once you dig a little deeper you realize just
how whorish and trifling they are. They are no better than the Pookies and
Ray-Rays they try to pull rank over. More often than not these so-called good
black men have a little money, a decent job, and some education. This is the
MAIN reason they walk around feeling special. However, instead of being stand up
men (or REAL good men) and seeking a wife, they take advantage of their low
numbers and the high number of single black women. So, I say FUCK THEM. I can’t
see myself being allies with these so-called good black men because I don’t
respect or trust them.
Finding a true stand up black man is like finding a needle in a haystack. Great
if you find one (I count my blessing daily) not the end of the world if you
don’t find one (my life will keep moving with or without a man...I love my soon
to be husband dearly but I'm not going to lay down and die if things go south).
I got nothing but love for the REAL "good" black men who are handling their
business (that includes actually being faithful, loving ONE woman, and making
her your wife), but let’s not act like those individuals are the majority or
even half of the African American male population. There aren’t enough of these
men to go around. These individuals cannot take up the slack for all the other
fucked up black men. Black folks need to concede to this reality (which helps my
Now what this is a prime case of is the enormous difficulty women like her have in giving black men any credit. She can’t comfortably claim that all or most black men are uneducated street thugs, so she must find a way to degrade those who are productive. Thus, she eliminates any sense of them being of quality by declaring them to be worthless simply because they are not “seeking a wife”. Of course, not “seeking a wife” as she puts it is actually a case of these men not marrying the first black woman each of them encounters.
The reality is that the vast majority of black men do plan to marry at some point and are always open to it when and if they meet the right women. What fails to do and what those of her type fail to do is to acknowledge that most black women today are not very appealing from the standpoint of marriage. Yes, there are plenty of very sexy black women with desirable bodies and faces; more than other groups in my opinion. There are many who are very fun to be around. The problem is that it takes far more than that to be considered marriage material. Many of our women lack the sweetness men like and instead exude course personalities that border on masculine while readily obtaining masculine tattoos and discarding any sense of ladylike behavior. Many take pride in being loud and using profanity. Many black women are very pugnacious and give off the impression that a life with them would be life lacking in harmony. Men don’t mind a challenge when chasing tail, yet we don’t want to have to be challenged daily by our wives. We don’t want to constantly be pressured to please a woman who cannot be pleased. We don’t want a woman who can see no other use for a dollar other than to spend it (which is why the average single black woman has a medium net worth of $5.00). When a man marries a woman, what belongs to him tends to belong to her while what belongs to her remains hers. Thus, a man is expected to contribute to the spending habits of his wife and women who are irresponsible with money will be irresponsible with their husbands’ money.
And let’s face it. Studies have shown that a woman’s marriage possibilities decline as her weight goes up and one can easily see a direct relationship between black women’s general weight problems and their inability to get husbands.
Yet, women such as Von treat being educated and having a profession as all a black woman should need to get a husband (and most are actually not highly educated nor professionals). This is a prime example of black women trying to place their points of view into the heads of men. Women desire professional men because women place priority on men who have money. Men don’t place nearly that amount of priority on women’s earning potential. Thus, being educated and professional is low on the list on what men seek in a wife. We want good looks, a sweet personality, common sense and a positive attitude. We don’t want the cynicism and truculence so many black women are socialized to have.
THIS IS WHY SO MANY OF US AVOID MARRIAGE.
As far as what the “good” black men are doing about the “bad” black men, I would challenge her to tell us exactly what good men are supposed to do. A man’s ultimate responsibility is to his family. His responsibility is to protect and provide for his wife and children and to use his influence to guide them. How exactly does putting them and himself in jeopardy by confronting thugs and drug dealers fit in with protecting his family? Would it not be stupid to start a war against drug dealers and gang members so that they can vengefully break into your house and rape your wife because you were “snitching” to the police or trying to mess up their business? A good man tries to build up his finances so that he can move his family out of that situation. Otherwise, he does what he can to protect them and this involves not drawing the attention of thugs to himself so as to endanger his life and the well being of his family. She even contradicts herself when she says:
“These individuals cannot take up the slack for all the other fucked up black men.”
She can’t even remain consistent. According to her earlier statement, not being able to “take up the slack for all the other fucked up black men” would eliminate them from the category of “good black men”. How can they not be confronting the bad black men while at the same time trying to “pull rank” on the “Pookies” and “Ray-Rays” ? One should at least try to remain consistent within their one post.
In reality, community activists fill practically every black community. It is not hard to find black men volunteering time to try and help steer youth in the right direction. There are many black men voluntarily coaching youth sports leagues. There are plenty of black men working in community centers. But since they are not confronting drug dealers in suicidal fashion, they are not good men. Amazing.
The greatest way to get rid of bad black men is to stop rewarding them sexually. The worst street thugs and players routinely attract the attention of some of the most desirable women in the community. Much of what men do is for the purpose of attracting women so if a community is filled with drug dealers, hoodlums, gang members, etc., one can attribute this greatly to the number of women who find them appealing. What should be doing is telling the Latifahs and Kameishas of the world to stop their thug-love.
Check this out:
To get to the root of male-on-male violence, we need to take a closer look atHere is more:
human sexuality and human sexual selection. We all know that women are the
ultimate selectors in the sexual game (and if you don’t know that, then go ask
ten different married women who made the ultimate selection). The facts are
pretty straightforward: Women ovulate once a month, and a pregnancy takes nine
months during which you become increasingly immobilized. Men, on the other hand,
produce millions of sperms each hour, and are not physically affected at all
while they are waiting to become fathers. Who has more reason to choose their
sexual partner carefully, men or women? Who is the buyer and who is the seller
in the sexual market?
What this means is that men have always had to work
hard in order to prove their worth to women. In fact, the competition between
men has been so fierce that only half as many men as women have passed on their
genes throughout history, according to a research report from
2004. This kind of competition to get access to sex and to have the ability
to pass on your genes has never been a situation that women have needed to face,
and for the most part women simply fail to understand this aspect of being a
Men will compete in whatever ways are available to reach the top of the
food chain, and be able to provide for women. In a civilized society that will
usually mean constructive behaviors such as working hard and becoming a well
respected person. In an uncivilized society, which has been the case through
most of history, men will instead resort to violence towards other men, to fend
off the competition. Why are so many women attracted to bad boys and even
prisoners? Well, during most of human history that kind of behavior from men was
an effective way to be respected by other men and therefore rise to the top of
the food chain.
Male violence is therefore the end result of a dance in
which both women and men participate. Women select the most suitable men, men
compete to be chosen (using violence if needed), women again select the most
suitable men (regardless of whether they used violence or not to become
suitable), men compete to be chosen… On and on it goes.
“The more men have to offer, the more valuable they become to women as a
reproductive resource,” Geary says. “For this reason, men in all cultures are
highly motivated to attain social status and control of culturally significant
resources. Male-male competition is about making themselves attractive to women
but the competition also can lead men to compete in lethal ways to gain control
of social resources.”